Going Bananas

As this long & busy holiday weekend winds down and I prepare myself for the upcoming work week, I find myself needing a motivational boost--and a tasty treat.

First...here's the treat:

A Baked Banana

1 underripe medium banana
Dash lemon juice
4 tsp artificial sweetener
Dash ginger

Bake banana in its skin at 375F about 25 minutes. Peel skin; sprinkle with lemon juice and sweetener; add dash of ginger.

(Why is this such a rare treat? Well, because on the 1972 Retro WW Plan--although fruit is required 3 times per day--bananas are one of the "limited" fruits which is only permitted once per week! Also included on this list? Grapes and Cherries. That's just the rules, folks--don't try to understand it.)

Next...here's the motivational boost:

A Jean Nidetch Quote

The beautiful thing about losing weight, and I think probably any other kind of accomplishment that takes some sustained effort, is that it lets you know you can succeed at anything you really want to do. I am here to tell you that there is no limit to what you can accomplish, but you have to commit yourself to following your dream...Those who are successful with the program are the ones who tell themselves that they are not going to let anything stand in their way. People who say they can't succeed spend the rest of their lives proving it.

--Jean Nidetch, The Jean Nidetch Story 2009

Ahhh! There's nothing quite like a Tasty Baked Banana Treat and a Good Ol' Jean Nidetch Quote to get your week started on the right foot. Thanks Jean. Now I am ready to face the world.

PS: Stop back later this week to check out my atrocious yet entertaining experiment involving an unsuspecting bunch of celery, a jar of pimentos and some dental floss! You know you're curious...

Precious Pizza: Why Are You So EVIL?

Friday has always been a "date night" for me and my hubby. We love to go out for a few cocktails and some yummy food. Usually we try to find a nice place with a fun atmosphere that serves somewhat healthy dishes, so I can order some fish or a nice salad. You know-- the usual WW stuff.

However, on occasion, my sweet and adorable hubby throws me a curve ball. Let's get a pizza. He says it so simply and innocently; without any knowledge of the beast he is awakening. Just the thought of it sends a chill up my spine.

You see. Pizza is not just a trigger food or a 'red-light' food for me. It is a passageway to potentially horrible things. Just one slice and it could get REALLY ugly. Sorta like this:

"We wants it, we needs it. Must have the precious." -Gollum, Lord of the Rings

Here is a sample of the train of thought that may cross my mind as the pizza conundrum is being contemplated:

• How will I feel if I eat the pizza?
• How will I feel if I don't eat the pizza?
• How many pieces will I eat?
• How many pieces will I REALLY eat?
• What horrible events will the pizza eating lead to?
• Will I be able to recover from this pizza eating event?
• Will this pizza eating event lead to an endless spiral of emotional self-flagellation from which I will never fully recover?
• Will this pizza eating event be the ultimate turning point in my relationship with food that will send me back on the path to being overweight again?

Anyway. You get the point. Am I insane, or has 10 years of the "dieting mentality" finally taken all the fun out of enjoying my favorite food? You be the judge.

Well folks. I think that my hero, Ms. Jean Nidetch, has come to the rescue once again with a solution. It's called the Pizzaiola. So maybe this charming 1972 Retro Pizza Recipe will satisfy my yearning for some pizza pie?

1 slice bread (I used 1/2 an Arnold's Sandwich Thin)
1/2 cup tomato juice, cooked down to half volume
Dash of Italian seasonings
2 oz. shredded hard cheese

Toast the bread lightly. Spread with juice & seasoning and sprinkle with cheese. Place under broiler until cheese is melted. One slice and done, baby! Now that's what I call portion control!

No guilt, No flavor, No fun! Now where did I put that Pizza Hut menu?

Thanks, But No Thanks Thursday (En Masque)

This week's TBNT Thursday feature is sure to make you shudder. It's a mind-blowing mold from the 1974 Weight Watchers Recipe Cards - Classic Adaptations Category.

Take a look, and I'll fill you in on the details below:

Liver Pate en Masque

This recipe calls for 2 (not 1) envelopes of Knox gelatine - so you know right there you're in trouble. Now go ahead and punish that gelatine in your blender with 1 cup of bouillon, 2 cups french-style green beans, seasonings, extracts and one heaving pound of cooked liver. Process until smooth. Pour into a 1 quart mold and chill.

Sadly, it gets worse. We now have to make the "glaze", or the "masque" - as it were. I will give you 3 guesses as to what goes in that glaze. Yep, more Knox gelatine. Oh, and also: buttermilk, mustard, bouillon and more seasonings. Try to keep up...

After the glaze has been simmered to the perfect syrupy consistency -- one must spoon that drippy, gooey substance over the unmolded, chilled liver mold approximately 3 to 4 times. Re-chilling and re-setting after each coating. This will help you achieve the lovely dripping candle-wax effect. As a final touch--the chicory and radish garnish adds a lovely flair, doesn't it?

I do believe I would have to be seriously drugged or knocked out cold before I would even consider eating this. Thanks, but No Thanks.

Hard Times at the 1972 Retro WW Experiment...

This week, I was beginning to feel a bit lackluster about the whole Retro WW Experiment. I'll be the first to admit it. And just like any other "diet", there comes a day when you have to decide: how long can I keep this up?

I started thinking about how nice it would be to just order a pizza, or go to Dairy Queen, or throw away the Knox Gelatine. (I really need to take a break from those horrifying molds.)

I even tried to tap into my "Inner Jean Nidetch". What would Jean tell me to do? She certainly wouldn't let me give up; Or make excuses; Or feel sorry for myself.

She would tell me: "It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny."

So today, I made the difficult choice to keep going. Why? I have no idea. But what I can tell you is that I pulled out my 1972 WW Program Cookbook, found a great recipe, put on my 70's tunes - and it felt great.

So here is the recipe that pulled me out of my doldrums and back into my 1972 Retro splendor:

Split Pea Patties

6 oz. cooked split peas

1/4 cup skim milk
salt & pepper
1/8 tsp sage
1/8 tsp marjoram
1/8 tsp thyme

Process all ingredients in blender, chill, and form into 8 small patties. bake at 400F for 15 minutes and top with barbecue sauce.

OK--so I didn't have time to cook split peas, (give me a break) so I used a small can of chick peas instead. But--I did make my own barbecue sauce out of tomato juice, vinegar, lemon juice, Worcestershire, brown sugar, and dry mustard! Very retro, baby!

These spicy little patties were delicious with a little cilantro, and were just what I needed to get me back on the Retro WW Wagon. The 70's music helped a little, too.

Forbidden vs. Unlimited Foods?

This weekend, I got to thinking how easy we have it in the 21st century version of Weight Watchers.

Since there are no forbidden foods in the modern day version of WW, you can have a totally bat-crap crazy, balls-out binge-fest, and still be considered "on-program". Well, technically, that is... If you track what you eat, and get right back on the wagon. It's totally AWESOME.

But there are so many forbidden foods on the 1972 Retro WW Plan, it can be almost overwhelming at times. In fact, last week, I realized I went through an entire day and did not eat a single "legal" food. (Oh yeah--you fall off the wagon a lot on the Retro WW Plan, did I not mention that yet?) It's a good thing I still keep my points tracker handy for the days I need to slip into "Emergency 2010 WW Mode".

However, on the Retro WW Plan, we are lucky enough to have a list of foods that are permitted in unlimited amounts. You are allowed to eat these foods as desired and with reckless abandon. Yeehaw!

Brace yourselves! For your pleasure, here is the 1972 "unlimited" list as it appears in toto:

Capers
Clam Juice
Celery
Club Soda
Chicory
Coffee & Tea
Chives
Herbs & Spices
Escarole
Dehydrated Vegetable Flakes
Gherkins
Horseradish
Lettuce
Mustard
Parsley
Lemon & Lime Juice
Pimentos
Pepper Sauce
Radishes
Vinegar
Truffles
Worcestershire
Soy Sauce
Seaweed
Watercress
Water

Doesn't this list make you want to jump for joy? Are you salivating uncontrollably after reading it?

Sometimes, I like to study this list and try to come up with the most outrageous meals ever created, and then imagine myself eating them in mass quantities. I mean, they are unlimited, right? Could I eat 14 pounds of gherkins and radishes? Hmmmm... Maybe.

With each passing day of my Retro WW "experiment", I gain more respect for those amazing women who actually followed this plan back in the 70's, and I thank my lucky stars for the points system! But for now---I must return to my gigantic seaweed and pimento salad.

Friday Mish Mash

mé·lange: (n.) A motley assortment of things.

Got some fruit? Got some vegetables? Great. Who cares what kind they are? Throw 'em in a pan with some brown sugar and you've got a Melange.

Carrot and Fruit Melange
Weight Watchers Revised Program Cookbook, 1972

4 oz. diced cooked carrots
1/2 cup cooked rice (or 1/2 cup bean sprouts)
3 tablespoons water
1 small orange cut in segments (or 1 small apple, cored and diced)
1 tsp. brown sugar
2 tsp. lemon juice
1 tsp. margarine

Combine all ingredients and heat gently. Makes one serving.

Surprisingly, I found this mixture quite appealing. So much so, that I am planning to create many more melanges and add them to my recipe repertoire.

Such as:

• Cucumber Banana Melange
• Eggplant Rhubarb Melange
• Pepperoni Pineapple Melange
• Frankfurter Strawberry Melange

Seriously. The possibilities are endless. Feel free to add your own to the list...

Thanks, But No Thanks Thursday - Food with a Face!

This week's TBNT Thursday feature is a simple recipe. You take a 3 pound red snapper - clean it, butterfly it, season it, and bake it. It's been done a million times, right?

Then how come I can't get past this picture:

Baked Snapper with Vegetable Topping
Best of Weight Watchers Magazine, 1974

The expression on this poor creature's face seems to be saying, "Why have you decorated me with lemon peel flowers and stripes of pureed pimento/radish/watercress and then stuck a lemon peel in my eyeball?"

This recipe makes 4 servings. Who gets the head? Thanks, but No Thanks.